Being a parent is no easy task. You try to do your best, but there are definitely times when you get to the end of the day and wonder if you did the right thing. Many times we feel like we’re just stumbling through the whole experience hoping that we don’t screw our kids up too badly.
I especially feel for those that are single parents. Being a parent is hard enough, but at least I have my wife on my team. There are times when we have to double team the kids in order to get the job done, kind of a good cop, bad cop deal. Sometimes we don’t even mean to, but in the moment we just need to tag out.
This especially happens with my youngest. He’s three years old and knows he’s cute. Lately we’ve had issues with him not wanting to eat his dinner, so we’ve taken to making him stay at the table until he’s finished. The scenario often plays out with my wife starting the enforcement. However, as the time begins to pass, he will be begin to turn on the charm. She’ll be in mid-sentence sternly telling him to eat his dinner when he pulls out the puppy dog eyes and begin to tell her how much he loves her.
It’s at the point that I have to jump in as she’s fighting back a laugh and trying to stay in the character of bad cop. The truth is, none of us want to be bad cop. We want to give our children nice things, especially when they’re being cute. We like to give nice things to our kids.
I’ll even admit that there are times I want to give in even when he’s not being cute. When my toddler is screaming and throwing a tantrum that I just want to give him whatever he wants just so that he’ll stop crying. I know that’s not the way to handle it. He has to learn that throwing a tantrum is not a good way to deal with his problems, but truth be told, I just get sick of hearing him cry so I’m tempted to just give in. In those times it’s a test of who’s more persistent, me or the toddler.
This scenario is similar to a parable that Jesus told. Typically his parables revolve around what God is like or what the Kingdom of Heaven is like. However, the parable Jesus tells in Luke 18:1-5 seems to take the opposite approach.
The first thing to note in this parable is Jesus’ reason behind telling it. Typically he’s trying to explain to them a spiritual reality, but here his purpose is illicit action on the part of the disciples. He tells them this parable to tell them “that they should always pray and not give up.” Other translations say “and not lose heart,” or “and not faint.” It carries with it this idea that if they don’t pray they will give up, lose heart, or faint.
We are commanded in scripture to “pray without ceasing” (1 Thess. 5:17). This doesn’t mean to keep rambling on with our words. We’re specifically told not to do that (Matt. 6:5-15). Instead, prayer should be a natural part of our lives, much like breathing. We don’t consciously choose to breathe. In fact, if you do try to consciously breathe, you typically get all out of whack when you try. Prayer is communicating the desires of your heart to God. We typically do this with our lips, but even if we never speak a word, we can constantly lay our desires at the throne of God.
Our sinful, dying world is toxic to a healthy relationship with God. The world is constantly trying to tell us that right is wrong and up is down. Much like in a gas chamber, if you continue to breathe in those toxic fumes, they will eventually overtake you. Prayer is like a breath of fresh air that we draw from heaven. This is why Jesus tells them to pray and not faint. As we continually pray, we continue to breathe in God’s goodness which strengthens us.
As we get into the heart of the parable, notice that Jesus did not say that God’s people are like this woman. He also did not say that God is like this king. This is important to note for many reasons.
The courts in those days were much different than they are right now. They didn’t have a nice courtroom in a fine building in which an honorable judge oversaw the cases brought before him. The judge’s tent was moved from region to region as the judge completed his circuit.
Within his tent the judge, surrounded by his assistants, set the agenda. They were the ones that decided which cases would be heard. Anybody could watch the cases, but only those who were approved would actually have their cases tried. This typically meant that you had to grease the palms of the judge and his assistants in order to be heard.
Widows were not known to be wealthy people. In that culture it was a man’s job to care for the women in his family. This is why there was so much emphasis placed on caring for widows. Women were considered to be second class. A woman couldn’t just go before the judge. It was the place of the man in charge of her to plead her case. However, being a widow, this woman had nobody to plead for her.
Likewise, without a man to care for her, she had little money. Seeing as how the easiest way to have your case tried was to bribe the judge, there was little chance that she’d have her case heard. These were two major strikes against her.
Again, Jesus doesn’t say that God’s people are like this woman. There are some glaring differences between the two. First, the woman did not know the judge. She was a stranger with no standing. On the other hand, we are God’s children. While the judge cared nothing for this widow, God deeply loves his children. While the woman had not access to the judge due to her financial situation, we freely have access to the Father. We may bring our petitions to him at any time.
This widow had nobody to go to bat for her. Without a man in her life there was nobody to go to the judge on her behalf. However, scripture tells us that we have an advocate in Jesus Christ. He will go to father on our behalf and represent us before the throne of God.
Through his word to us, we can fall back upon the promises of God. He promises us that he will take care of our needs. He has promised to be our shield. This widow had no such promises from the judge. As she cried out to the judge, she had no reassurance that he would do anything to help her.
The biggest difference between us and this widow is that while this widow came to a court of law we are able to come to God’s throne of grace. She had no hope of mercy or compassion. She was at the mercy of the law. We on the other had have a gracious God that desires the best for his children. The God that we serve is nothing like this unjust judge. Jesus highlights this in the final part of the parable (Luke 18:6-8).
In reading this parable, if we fail to understand that Jesus is contrasting us versus the widow and the Father versus the judge, it may seem that in order to have our prayers heard and answered we must badger and bribe God. In contrast, God is not like this judge. He is a loving father that seeks the well-being of his children. He is attentive and generous. He is concerned for us and ready to answer when we call.
In short, our God in heaven is nothing like this unjust judge and we are nothing like this widow, but that’s the point. If an unjust judge will give justice to widow that persistently pleads to him, how much more will God listen when we bring to him the desires of our hearts? If a judge that doesn’t know or care for this woman will give her justice, a Heavenly Father that loves and cares for us will do so all the more.
We then must address the topic of unanswered prayer. Jesus says, “I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly.” In our haste to declare that God has left our prayers unanswered, we must remember that God’s delays are not delays of inactivity. Instead, they are delays of preparation.
Romans 8:28 tells us that “in all things God works for the good of those who love him.” God is always answering prayer, otherwise this verse can’t be in the Bible. He is constantly at work causing all things to work together to accomplish his purposes. The instant we make a request of God that is in his will (1 John 5:14-15), he begins the preparations to bring that desire into reality. We may not see his hand at work, but he is working all the same.
This brings us to Jesus’ final statement of the parable. “However, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on the earth?” This world is toxic, and as the scriptures show us, there is little faith remaining on the earth in the last days. Eight people were saved in Noah’s day and only four from Sodom. This is why Jesus told his disciples this parable that they might always pray and not faint.
If we are going to survive in this toxic world, we must pray without ceasing. We must regularly be in tune with the heart and will of God so that we might receive that breath of fresh air we so desperately need. My challenge to you then is to not give up.